Will the real Southern Baptist/un-Baptist/Calvinist/Anti-Calvinist Please Stand Up

Well, alrighty then.

I’ve dusted off the keys, and though still a little bleary-eyed and a bit more near-sighted than before, am none the worse for Hebrew wear. Since I last blogged:

— Church History 1, Systematic Theology 3, and Introduction to Biblical Counseling are finished, and Hebrew, mercifully, is done (though I could say that I am ‘done’ with Hebrew — or Hebrew is done with me, which would not be entirely true, because there remains the little issue of required Hebrew syntax, which, if Elementary Hebrew were likened to jabbing vowel points under the fingernails, syntax is the waterboarding of the language gestapo).

— Metz turned 1 and Brooks turned 9 (see the family blog link to the right). This is not to say that this was the only offspring activity, since the two middle children — Eli, 6 and Audrey, 4 — while not advancing in age, did advance my blood pressure and begin 1st grade and kindergarten, respectively.

— The house is on the market. Buy it. Now. Please. Hurry. Bless you.

— Hades has broken out in the SBC blogging and conference world. Well, maybe not Hades, per se, but a suburb thereof, perhaps less like eternal perdition than a really bad beach vacation with a looming hurricane, jellyfish swarms and sand fleas in the Bermuda shorts. Ok, Hades, it is.

It is no mere curiosity of timing that all the brouhaha over Jerry Vines’ John 3:16 Conference, which was somewhat reactionary to the Building Bridges Conference, together with anti-Calvinists who prefer the nomenclature “pro-non-Calvinist” throwing stones at “anti-missions-hyper-Calvinists” who actually were evangelizing Muslims at the time, and 7-point Southern Baptists alleging that 5-point Calvinists were a greater threat to the denomination than churches who can’t find half their members, baptize nobody, enroll everybody, and divorce like rabbits multiply but who don’t drink, play cards or go with girls who do, ALL HAPPENED WHEN I WAS NOT BLOGGING.

Now, as my college statistics professor said, “correlation does not necessarily mean causation” (he also said my fraternity brothers were a “cesspool of ignorance,” but that is a different story), but the evidence speaks for itself.

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